Blade Running

After months of anticipation, seeking insurance approvals, going for fittings and taking cautious test flights indoors, I went for my first run in two years on Wednesday!

There was no pain and the motion felt extremely natural once I found my groove. It seems to be all about finding a rhythm.

I was very awkward at first, having a nearly uncontrollable pogo-stick springing motion off my left side and a resounding "thud" on my right (my real leg). I slowed my cadence and lengthened my stride, finding a more suitable pace. I settled in quickly and everything started to click!

What a great feeling!

My cardiovascular system is still in great shape but my running muscles are very weak. My hamstrings were tight and sore afterward so I'll start small and train up a bit but it's great to be back on the path.

It was a great achievement for my second Legadon.

The Elmer Fudd Conundrum

Things have been a bit quiet lately (too quiet) thanks in part to a ridiculous "Cease and Desist" order I received on one of my travel tips posts, resulting in the addition of a neat little disclaimer in the "About this Blog" section of the site.

Needless to say, I'll have to be a bit more cautious with how I word my posts in the future.

That aside, in the last few months I've been traveling a lot for work and have managed to see some very interesting and remote places. I also have a few good personal travel stories to catch up on; no excuses there! I'll back-post a few of them to fill in the blanks.

My biggest news is that on Friday, I finally received my new definitive leg after months of working with several different agencies.

The new leg is much lighter than my old one (by roughly one kilo / two pounds) and a lot more responsive. It also fits! Imagine that...

As you can see from the photo below, the new leg is a continuous blade of carbon fibre that extends from the socket through to the toe. No moving parts this time! My old model had a separate foot strapped to a pylon with an air shock. This made the height ever changing and difficult to predict as the air pressure changed due to heat, etc.

My old model also required a suspension liner be worn over my knee, greatly reducing my mobility whereas the new model uses a "seal in" liner instead, freeing up my knee.

Leg-a-versary!

Today, March 19th, is my Leg-a-versary.

It's hard to believe it's only been one year since I received this leg. I still can't believe it took so long to get one but at least I can proudly say I put it to the test once I did. Here's a few photos from my leg's first year:

New Socket

Just a short post to say that I received my new socket on Tuesday.

Breaking in a new socket is a bit like breaking in a new pair of hiking boots, only the carbon fibre and kevlar don't mold or wear in, the leg-flesh does all the adjusting.

Because my last two sockets have been so big, I have new/different loading points on my Lend (Limb-End) to adapt to. This means an awkward uncomfortable feeling that gives me a bit of a limp. I wouldn't call it pain, it's just uncomfortable.

I'm hoping my leg will adapt quickly. It did last time so I'm not too worried. Either way, it's much better than having a socket the size of a garbage can strapped to my leg, so I'm a happy camper.

I'm a Poster!

I went in to get fitted for my check-socket today and found a little poster of ME in the Gait Lab!

Check-socket - cheap plastic socket used to work out any "bugs" in my fit before they cast it in the expensive carbon fibre and Kevlar, making me 10% bullet-proof.

Gait Lab - a small room with a set of parallel bars used to analyse someone's "Gait" (the way they walk). All amputees pass through this lab anytime an adjustment is needed or they get a new leg.

The Gait Lab has all sorts of posters of people doing "amazing" things like running through a park or camping at the top of a mountain. They're meant to be inspiring.

They had quite the opposite affect on me!

On my first day in the lab, after patiently waiting so long to get going on my new leg, these posters scared the hell out of me.

Afterall, if camping on a mountain top or going for a jog in the park is the exception to the rule, so much so that the guy gets his own poster, then what should I expect?

Not to dismiss what those people in the posters are doing, not by any means! Many of them are above-knee amputees (I can't imagine how tough that would be) and climbing a mountain is no small feat when you have fake feet. I guess it just sent a shiver down my spine thinking that these images are meant to be the "pinnacle of what can be achieved".

Lucky for me, I already knew a guy racing Triathlons so I knew to set my goals a bit higher!

Now I just need to find someone who'll make me an action figure... and yes, I really should be paying my photographer a lot more!


The Gait Lab.


This is a cool poster!

Leg Update

I received my long-awaited new socket on Thursday.

The Good:
As prosthetic leg sockets go, this looks sweet! The weight of the carbon fibre is significantly less than my old white plastic job. It's also not nearly as bulky under my jeans at work either and looks awesome when I wear shorts.

The Bad:
It's the wrong size... in fact, it's slightly larger than my last one. It was meant to fit me like a glove and instead fits like a large garbage can. They've packed it with some foam and promised to make me a new one, but it means more waiting and walking on something that isn't right.

Staying Positive:
It's discouraging but at very least the shape is better than the last one. Even though it's still huge, it more closely matches the shape of my leg than the last one so when I pack it full of extra padding, it's at least a better shape. I guess that's an improvement.

It also means that in a month, we'll have TWO old sockets to experiment with for new climbing leg designs. The socket was always going to be the hard part to source. The rest is just machined aluminum which we've already worked out. I even have a prosthetist contact now (outside of my treatment) who's willing to help with the design. All big bonus points.

Dude, what's that on your Leg?

I've been asked a few times now what I've got strapped to the back of my leg.

That, my friends, is the patent-pending (not really) Macgyver leg bag, suitable for any gadget-phile who can only count to 15 and doesn't wear cargo-pants to work!

The bag is filled with all the things I wish I could keep on my keychain but don't have the space for. Included in my bag of tricks are:
- a Flashlight
- Pliers
- Scissors
- Tweezers
- Self-adhering velcro strips (for strapping my foot to pedals, etc)
- Lockpicks (you gotta have a hobby)
- Plastic bag (for water proofing Steve-the-leg)
- one "Skins" compression sock (hides the plastic bag)

... and various other bits-and-bobs I throw in there in case I'm ever in a pinch and need to rapidly diffuse a nuclear bomb then perform a daring escape.

I got the idea when I noticed I wasn't being limited by all the fleshy bits of my calf muscle and suddenly had reams of extra space to play with. Yes, that's just one of the many advantages of the instant-weight-loss program I was on.

It's like carrying a purse, but far more manly and spy-like!

An added bonus is that it gives me a "calf muscle" appearance in jeans without adding bulk.

The important thing is to keep the weight down so all items are extremely small and metal objects are made of titanium or aluminum. All in all, I don't notice the extra weight and you'd be amazed at how often I need the scissors and/or pliers.

Now I just need to remember to take that off before I head through airport security...

Leg Training: Day Five

Day Five: call him "Steve".

You might have heard Andrea commenting in the video (last post) about how many questions I ask her on a daily basis. She only *thinks* I ask a "lot" of questions. If she knew how many I hold back, she'd probably quit!

I've had several people ask me why I'm meant to limit my time on the leg each day. This is to allow for a few things to happen:
a) toughen up my stump and desensitize those nerve endings slowly
b) strengthen my leg muscles without straining them
c) keep me from developing a bad habit from over-doing it to a pain-point

I can't wait to actually put this thing to good use. It's still quite awkward right now but I think I'm already improving a lot. I'm down to one cane most of the time and that's just for balance when I stumble, etc.

Walking around the Southbank markets on Friday night and having an ice-cream went very well. The only trick is now there's not a lot of indication to others that I'm not so stable. The crutches were more obvious so people gave me lots of space; the canes are subtle so I got jostled more than once. No problem, Steve (my leg) and his sidekicks (the canes) held me up just fine.

The canes also keep me from falling down when I suddenly do something painful that I don't expect to hurt. I'm learning very quickly what those things are... rotating/pivoting in the socket: ouch!

The nice thing is that I'm up to three hours in the morning and three in the evening already, so at six hours a day, the volume of information I'm processing is huge and the learning curve is being whittled away at a nice pace.

Steve the stunt double needs a few adjustments but I'll be in to see my tailor in the morning so it's all good!

Leg Day!

Yep, that's me, today, on two legs!

We started off in the parallel bars and quickly moved to using two walking sticks. That was lesson one! Easy as pie once I stopped duffing my toe on the ground.

On to lesson two: walking outside on uneven ground, up a flight of stairs, down/up a slope and over rocky terrain. It all was all fantastic!

Andrea (my physio) is great! Lisa and I brought her a nice coffee this morning to kick off the day right and she got me moving so quickly. I feel really good about the progress today. I know it's going to be a challenge to do it "very well" but I'm taking it slow, trying to get it right rather than going too fast and getting a bad habit.

Walking on the leg feels a bit strange. The first few steps were a bit like walking in a ski-boot. By the end of the session it was more like walking in a snowboard boot. By the end of the day, it felt like a stiff hiking boot. All good signs that it's getting easier and more natural!

I have it home with me now! I'm still wearing it. Good luck getting this off me now!I'll be on two walking sticks for the rest of the week, then down to one stick next week, then off the sticks all together.

For the next two days, I can spend two hours in the morning and two hours in the evening on the leg. By the weekend that will be up to three hours each. After another week, I should be up to unlimited time!

I was able to wear the new hardware into work for a little bit. I had to take it off part way through the day to give my leg a rest but the grin didn't fade.

On my way out, on the crutches, I had to strap the leg and the walking sticks to my pack. Probably looked a bit funny carrying a leg on my back!

Can't wait to drive around with it hanging out of the trunk of the car or leave it sticking out from under the garage door some time!

Here's the video of my first steps:

Just a Test Drive

Today was a day of very mixed and overwhelming emotions.

I woke up feeling extremely anxious. What if it doesn't fit? If they see pain on my face will they decide I can't have it? What if there's another delay? What if my leg has changed shape since they took the cast?

Those fears were realized on arriving at my fitting! The liner they gave me didn't fit with my leg in the socket.

I was determined to get it on. I pushed harder and took more pain than I should have, yelling like a drill Sergent in my head: "suck it up princess, you push 'til you bleed or pass out, but you damn well get it on before they take it back!"

I got very very scared. I wondered if anyone would notice me hide it under my shirt and run out..

Lucky for me, the liner they ordered for me was just too thick (for now, I'll shrink) and they had a thinner one on hand.

To my very great relief, with the new liner in place, the leg popped on with a very snug but easy fit. I was elated! About a hundred minor little adjustments later, we were done and the stunt double was locked back away in a little closet, waiting for Thursday.

It was all over so fast! I tried playing the "but it's my birthday" card, but no dice, that gift has to wait two more days!

I would equate this to taking a really amazing luxury sports car for a test drive and loving every minute of it. You're absolutely sure this is the car for you: you know you can afford it, it's everything you'd hoped and you know it's got the best safety rating/fuel economy and horsepower money can buy. As a bonus, it even has the stereo, nav system and light-up-cup-holders you wanted plus you find out the dash lights up with sexy blue LED lights at night! You're ready to take delivery right then and there! That's when the salesman laughs in your face and says "we'll have to order one in for you, this one's already sold! Should be in next month."

The wait is killer but this next one really took me by surprise: there's a strange bitter-sweet sadness that this period of extreme challenge is coming to an end. I know the next one will be hard too, but I've been having a lot of fun!

I've enjoyed this period for what it was worth: every task required extra problem solving, extra time, extra balance. I've climbed mountains, hiked narrow trails, adapted a rock-climbing technique and swam about a hundred lengths of the pool. Everything feels like an accomplishment on crutches.

That cycle of achievement is addictive! I'm looking forward to what the next phase has to offer and I plan to keep that addiction through the next chapter(s) of my recovery.

After all the delays, my wait is nearly at an end. I was able to touch it, feel it, try it on and get that little taste of what it's going to be like. The wait now is all the worse but each second that ticks by gets me closer. Two more "sleeps" is an eternity right now.

Check out my fancy-schmancy diagram for more detail on the leg itself! Pretty cool stuff:

The Clock is Finally Ticking

I received the official call today!

Nope, still not turning to the priesthood, that ship has long since sailed. Instead, as of next week I'll be transitioning from tri-pod back to bi-ped. (I know I've used that joke before but you can't mess with a good recipe)

I'm seeing my tailor on Tuesday to try on the latest in Robocop gear, then I have to spend an agonizing Wednesday daydreaming in 80's movie montage sequences about running through meadows and frolicking on the beach with my new leg.

Thursday will be the big day. I should be receiving Lefty's stunt double in the morning at rehab to take my first steps in five months. Andrea my physio has assured me that she'll let me take it home that day so I can sleep with it under my pillow.

I'm trying to overlook the fact that it's currently 17 weeks overdue, 18 when I finally go in. It's been one hell of a mental hill to climb. The physical challenge has been easy enough to overcome but the mental barriers have been the hardest to push through given the moving target dates.

You can bet the paparazzi will be out in full force to document the affair so keep your eyes out for updates!

Leg Update

Still no official word but the Oscar buzz is that Lefty's stunt double is set to make an appearance late this week or early next.

Needless to say I've been eagerly checking my phone every 10 minutes for the last two weeks for the magic phone call but it still hasn't come. I've taken to calling my prosthetist "my tailor" and I've been in to see my tailor several times now.

Last word was that the foot still hasn't arrived so final assembly still hasn't taken place. I'm starting to wonder if it's coming directly from Iceland via dogsled and... well... carrier-dolphin?

I'll let you know as soon as I get the call! Until then, every night is like Christmas Eve, only Santa is one sick SOB who keeps changing the date.

Leg Update

Another week drifts by, another delay. If patience is a virtue, I must be headed for sainthood...

This is week 13 of being on crutches after being told the whole process should only take 6 weeks. That's after being on my back for 8 weeks so I guess you could say it's still an improvement.

After they were surprised that the parts hadn't arrived by last Friday, I received a call today telling me that my parts wouldn't be in this week either. There was a snafu with the ordering system and it apparently wasn't ordered afterall. They "think" it's gone into the system today.

This means the crucial piece needed for casting *might* arrive as "early" as NEXT Friday, making my earliest possible casting appointment two more weeks from today. Once that's done, I still have three more weeks to wait. Five more weeks on crutches...

Disappointed? Did I mention how much I really love cereal? I'm starting to eye up that saw in the garage and my crutches are looking awfully re-engineerable right now... maybe showing up to rehab in a nice homemade wooden pegleg would speed the process along!

I really love cereal. Arrgh matey...

Leg Update

As you may have read, I was supposed to get cast for my prosthetic on Friday but this didn't happen. Instead, I woke up to a phone call telling me that the critical piece hadn't arrived yet and not to bother coming in. To say that I was bummed out is to say that the Pope is an old catholic guy who's afraid of change or that I like cereal... I really like cereal.

The parts are on order and they should arrive this coming week. Sure.. just one more week of waiting around... what could possibly bother me about that... just one.. more... week!?!?

Not to worry, Friday turned out to be a great day. After wallowing in self pity, I received an email from the Amputee and Family support group here in Brisbane asking that I share my experience with someone else who's having to make the same horrible decision I had to make. That's never easy for someone living that moment and I was thankful for the opportunity to give back.

We had a great chat Saturday morning. Talking about that very personal moment with someone else is therapeutic, so JW, I wish you the very best no matter which path you choose. You've already helped me a great deal and I thank you.